tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post7826896370079826380..comments2023-09-29T06:00:09.242-05:00Comments on Julie Pippert: Using My Words: Why did I think I could have it all, all at the same time?Julie Pipperthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03169574697104642479noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-54489117419010125652007-08-14T12:34:00.000-05:002007-08-14T12:34:00.000-05:00Nathania I'm glad you said that. I'm new here but...Nathania I'm glad you said that. I'm new here but this is a wonderful entry. I went through about 4 months where I had almost a constant migraine. SO many days in bed, with someone else -- and sometimes, NO ONE ELSE -- entertaining my girls. It's horrible to feel so incapable.<BR/><BR/>Then I realized that I was capable, it was just different. Capable of being quiet and still and holding my girls and loving them still. Your girls are lucky that they have you, since you're obviously so attentive to their needs. And I just... let go ... of the house. I let go of my pride in being a "clean" or "neat" person, realizing it had more to do with my own personal wish to be seen in a particular light, rather than doing what was making me and my family happy.<BR/><BR/>And, you know what? It's a few months later, my migraines are (suddenly & strangely) under control, and my house is neat and clean. Ish. Will never be what in my mind I think it should be, but we're all still here, anyway. On my death bed I hope I'll remember how much fun we had in our house, and not how filthy it sometimes was...rebeccahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00714733610486469945noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-56837092580912307082007-08-14T11:43:00.000-05:002007-08-14T11:43:00.000-05:00My friend's mom is known to say "I'd rather have a...My friend's mom is known to say "I'd rather have a happy family than a clean house."<BR/><BR/>She never apologized to guests for her mess. <BR/><BR/>I love that.Nathania Johnsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01163371364304453430noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-67481622893214160792007-08-13T14:28:00.000-05:002007-08-13T14:28:00.000-05:00Ugh. I know the situations are different, you have...Ugh. I know the situations are different, you have a personal illness and I have a KayTar with an illness...but I feel the same at times. It breaks my heart when BubTar says, "Why does KayTar ALWAYS have to be sick?" or "Why do we ALWAYS have to turn out the lights and not make any noise?" I know it isn't always...but in the midst of the disruption it feels like that, especially to a five year old. They are learning compassion through it, though.<BR/><BR/>As for the question, I don't know what my answer would be.Kylahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03311014761113076785noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-84763759059650572982007-08-13T12:05:00.000-05:002007-08-13T12:05:00.000-05:00Oh, Jul. A house cleaner would make my life so mu...Oh, Jul. A house cleaner would make my life so much better. Between the allergies, female things and IBS ... I've been a mess the last few weeks. Which hasn't been good since I'm unpacking.<BR/><BR/>The last few days the child and I have had "stay in your PJs all day" days. I can't manage much more at the moment.<BR/><BR/>I think we, a lot of the time, don't know how to ask for what we need. You know? Like, I can say "I need to clean my house" but I can't look at my husband and say, "I need time to must breathe". And I cant say that because society has told me that I'm not supposed to.<BR/><BR/>SIGH.<BR/><BR/>I'm exhausted. <BR/><BR/>I'm sorry you've got all this on you.kalirozhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10413769558136831135noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-68379492729934293462007-08-13T09:24:00.000-05:002007-08-13T09:24:00.000-05:00I have to tell you I have been thinking about this...I have to tell you I have been thinking about this very subject a lot lately. In fact I wrote about this subject recently. And I am also seriously considering hiring a cleaning service, too. I hope you are feeling better. Just curious, what are the subcontractors for?mpearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16740533492452830670noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-73726183053198304562007-08-13T07:10:00.000-05:002007-08-13T07:10:00.000-05:00I am fortunate enough to have a house cleaner, whi...I am fortunate enough to have a house cleaner, which is precisely what I need to keep me sane. PRECISELY. Otherwise, we constantly fight about the cleaning. Sure, full-time cook and 27 hours in the day would be nice, but the cleaner is all I really need to make it doable.<BR/><BR/>So glad you are getting the help you deserve.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-4156133277127374882007-08-13T06:22:00.000-05:002007-08-13T06:22:00.000-05:00I'm sorry you were feeling bad. Julie have you ev...I'm sorry you were feeling bad. Julie have you ever read "Being Perfect" by Anna Quindlen? It's a great little read if you haven't. <BR/><BR/>Let go of the Mama guilt because I promise you that if it wasn't your illness it would be something else. <BR/><BR/>We have had a house cleaner even when it meant eating canned tuna every night.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-45903989346999148492007-08-13T05:57:00.000-05:002007-08-13T05:57:00.000-05:00A housecleaner would do it for me too, though a ne...A housecleaner would do it for me too, though a new car wouldn't go astray either!<BR/><BR/>Used to have a housecleaner once a week and it was heaven. Then the husband died, the income was cut by two thirds and my parenting workload doubled, but bye bye housecleaner.<BR/><BR/>The Aussie term for this is: bugger!<BR/><BR/>AliMaisyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05309794913406397044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-75276381621541775132007-08-12T22:20:00.001-05:002007-08-12T22:20:00.001-05:00The housecleaning help is huge for me. It really i...The housecleaning help is huge for me. It really is. I hope you can find somebody and that it lessens your load.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-22271987385084823792007-08-12T22:20:00.000-05:002007-08-12T22:20:00.000-05:00I decided not to clutter up your comments section ...I decided not to clutter up your comments section and blog about it instead. ;)<BR/><BR/><A HREF="http://www.snoskred.org/2007/08/wanted-peace-and-quiet.html" REL="nofollow">Wanted : Peace And Quiet</A> <BR/><BR/>I'm glad you're making these changes, I think they'll be helpful to you. What your kids will remember years from now is not how clean the house was, but how much time you spent with them. So in the meantime, until you find a cleaner, when you see a chore look at your kids and forget the chore - read a book with them, make cookies, whatever floats your boat. ;)<BR/><BR/>One of my deepest beliefs is, we're here for a good time, not a long time. So we have to make the most of every moment. :)<BR/><BR/>Snoskred<BR/>http://www.snoskred.org/Snoskredhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12670406702782244306noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-63689118031508884072007-08-12T22:08:00.000-05:002007-08-12T22:08:00.000-05:00OK, read this, thought about it, and then had to c...OK, read this, thought about it, and then had to come back again with an answer.<BR/><BR/>First -- so sorry about the difficult time you've had healthwise. I hope easing the load will give you the rest and strength needed to keep up with those things most important to you.<BR/><BR/>As for what would ease my load -- well, I want a personal assistant.<BR/><BR/>Someone who makes and keeps the doctors' appointments, does the birthday shopping, takes the kids in for haircuts, remembers who needs to see the dentist when ... that sort of thing.<BR/><BR/>It's so tiring, maintaining this mental calendar and filing system. <BR/><BR/>My brain needs a break.Arkie Mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06344964379328685609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-80468721756621714202007-08-12T21:50:00.000-05:002007-08-12T21:50:00.000-05:00Excellent post, just excellent. I wish I could an...Excellent post, just excellent. I wish I could analyze things the way you do...<BR/><BR/>What do I need? I don't know...some capable person to step in and help me out, to take care of *me*--some time to not worry about my kids, the ability to know everything will turn out alright.<BR/><BR/>Oh, and a few weeks at the beach, that would be nice, too.Aliki2006https://www.blogger.com/profile/15763865834765963343noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-44955656903577830212007-08-12T21:23:00.000-05:002007-08-12T21:23:00.000-05:00Julie... award for you over my way. Peace, ~chaniJulie... award for you over my way. <BR/><BR/><BR/>Peace, <BR/><BR/>~chanithailandchanihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10171731740204067889noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-21849324361814809112007-08-12T20:38:00.000-05:002007-08-12T20:38:00.000-05:00How great that your husband asked the question, an...How great that your husband asked the question, and is with you in making it happen. It's true that we often need to reprioritize, including where we spend our money.<BR/><BR/>And hoorah on the kindness campaign!painted maypolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06446625015003854710noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-12520903318968954682007-08-12T19:13:00.000-05:002007-08-12T19:13:00.000-05:00For me it's a no-brainer. I need the boys to star...For me it's a no-brainer. I need the boys to start school again. Which is just another way of saying I need some time to myself.<BR/><BR/>I'm so glad you've done this, for your health. Just so glad.<BR/><BR/>And also so glad that the Kindness Campaign resulted in a happy trip to the fair!Shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05602868040771218507noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-29071788942333685212007-08-12T19:01:00.000-05:002007-08-12T19:01:00.000-05:00A housecleaner is so worth it. I have a woman come...A housecleaner is so worth it. I have a woman come in every other week. I still have to clean but no more scrubbing bathrooms! No more dusting the bedrooms! Yes, those are exclaimation points. I bought no new clothes this summer to keep that cleaning lady and it is so worth it.Gina Pintarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15089007650772242209noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-88431053378329189342007-08-12T18:45:00.000-05:002007-08-12T18:45:00.000-05:00i need one day a week to myself. i won't get it, ...i need one day a week to myself. i won't get it, but it's what i need.Girlplustwohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07056576921114387218noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-9776127342000109792007-08-12T18:15:00.000-05:002007-08-12T18:15:00.000-05:00Lovely post. I don't think a housekeeper would he...Lovely post. I don't think a housekeeper would help me - I don't really notice the dust bunnies. But something needs to give - I think I need a sabbatical. Instead of working full-time, I want a few months to regroup - exercise, putter, tackle some organizing, and maybe even dust. Oof. I don't know how that could happen, but I feel more and more that I need it. I've been working full time for 20 years without a break.Magpiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15460136246441367993noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-6504111088994263912007-08-12T17:08:00.000-05:002007-08-12T17:08:00.000-05:00I'm with LM! :)Seriously, I think a housekeeper w...I'm with LM! :)<BR/><BR/>Seriously, I think a housekeeper would take a huge weight off my shoulders. We used to have one...but had to let her go when we moved to BFE! <BR/><BR/>Maybe I need to do some calling around myself!<BR/><BR/>I hope you continue to give yourself a break...you certainly deserve it!Queen of the Mayhemhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10317309061471274358noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-51586735813888156852007-08-12T14:52:00.000-05:002007-08-12T14:52:00.000-05:00I need a friggin clone.Actually, it's funny how su...I need a friggin clone.<BR/><BR/>Actually, it's funny how subbing a lot of our daily chores out can really relieve a burden. We have a cleaning service that comes twice a week. It's not like they can declutter for me, but they keep my bathrooms and floors pretty clean. They do the hard stuff.<BR/><BR/>We had a lawn service for awhile and we got rid of it & we really need it back. I don't even have time to weed these days and it takes hubby 3 hours to mow our 4 acres on the lawn tractor, several times a week.<BR/><BR/>I'm glad you made the decision to give yourself a break from being supermom and hire some help. You're completely right that it is an investment in your family. I'm sure it will help!Lawyer Mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06819273107327846943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-70135869103341766422007-08-12T14:27:00.000-05:002007-08-12T14:27:00.000-05:00Liv, wise words. Thanks for sharing them. :)***Jo,...Liv, wise words. Thanks for sharing them. :)<BR/><BR/>***<BR/><BR/>Jo, I look forward to it!<BR/><BR/>***<BR/><BR/>Flutter, I know...easy to ask, hard to answer, harder to live sometimes.<BR/><BR/>***<BR/><BR/>Chani, me too. And no worries. It's all fine. I'm pretty sure we can all admit to similar at some time or other. I know I live in a glass house so I don't cast stones. :)Julie Pipperthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03169574697104642479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-90615863947678684482007-08-12T14:20:00.000-05:002007-08-12T14:20:00.000-05:00I am so glad you decided to put some things in pla...I am so glad you decided to put some things in place to relieve some of your stress. <BR/><BR/>Your health thanks you. :) <BR/><BR/>(And, as an aside, I apologize for corking off in your space last week. I hope you'll forgive my rather disgusting behavior.)<BR/><BR/><BR/>Peace, <BR/><BR/>~Chanithailandchanihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10171731740204067889noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-10519642441512602012007-08-12T14:15:00.000-05:002007-08-12T14:15:00.000-05:00vital, vital questionsvital, vital questionsflutterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11828689769747130419noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-14446043327771369702007-08-12T13:47:00.000-05:002007-08-12T13:47:00.000-05:00This is an amazing post. I think I'm going to have...This is an amazing post. I think I'm going to have to do one of my own on my site to answer your question. It's a very good one girl.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13083972.post-78031325948396092052007-08-12T11:43:00.000-05:002007-08-12T11:43:00.000-05:00I'd really like to mention some good words from a ...I'd really like to mention some good words from a businesswoman in her 70s. She said,"You can have it all. Just not at once." Although it is in the same vein as my recent post, I just want to mention that so many of us are feeling defeated by artificial expectations. Instead of wanting the big cake, maybe we should focus on a bite at a time. <BR/><BR/>I'm glad you stayed in with the kids--you trusted your gut.Livhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09154719979114564561noreply@blogger.com