In some things, in some ways, sometimes I look outward for validation of my worth and existence. I admit it. It's my weak spot, my vanity spot.
If you say I am clever, comment on a post, offer me an award, mention me on your blog, reply to a comment I left on your blog, or in any way flatter me as a writer...I am hopelessly, slavishly devoted to you. I will probably even add you to my blogroll just so everyone can see the list of all the cool kids who actually like me.
The girl, she knows she is vain in this regard, but after much vanity discussion and navel-gazing, she has decided to love herself anyway, as she is (ironically) and will keep searching for (1) internal validation and (2) her first person.
Until I reach a better point of self-actualization, though, may I just say that this week you people have been better than prozac and chocolate (together, with a side of white chocolate martini) for week one of PMDD?
Despite my potential arrogance in believing that (a) I have something worth saying that is also (b) worth hearing and (c) often a Deep Thought, but not in a Jack Handy funny sort of way, it gives me pleasure---yes, real actual happy feeling inside---to see that the words I write generate the intended effect, usually. I like to know that you agree, disagree, laughed, thought about it, learned something new. It's not a pride thing as in, "Lookee what *I* did!" It's actually an "Oh cool, I just love it when someone gives me the gift of stimulating thought, intriguing POV, personal experience I can relate to, and so forth. I'm glad I'm giving back a little of what I take out." When I hand out experience, thoughts, ideas, etc. I really do it with no strings attached. It's an unconditional gift, one I am paying forward because I find it out there, so often, for myself.
Let's begin with the Thinking Blogger award/meme.
Many thanks to the awesome Christina of A Mommy Story and the fabulous Peg of Peggy As She Is for giving me this nod.
I do want to provide something worthwhile through this blog. I probably am a little narcissistic a la Her Bad Mother's discussion because I must think I have something to tell you guys since I do all this writing. But I intend no condesecnsion a la NotSoSage's discussion.
I also admit it's sort of a roundtable discussion (that's why the comments are so valuable to me, especially long and/or opinionated ones) with a side of quest for self-actualization.
I process out loud in my corporeal life too.
And I listen a lot, and consider even more. That's why I like bloggers such as Kim, Gwen, and Lotta so much. They think about things, too, and approach the topics with reflection, opinion, and even better, humor.
More than that, though, is the flurry of warm fuzzies I feel to have bloggers I really like, respect and admire say, hey, you did good. Thanks Peg and Christina.
For the record, the award is now available in platinum, too. Just sayin' and you know, mentioning how a girl can never have too much bling, especially when it's free and fat-free and a bag of chips too. (Kidding!)
Also, for the record, if I linked to you above and mentioned you by name (yes, YOU! I did after all say your name and link you!) consider yourself thinking blogger award meme-tagged!
The love, however, did not stop with awards.
It did, however, stop with the scale. Frozen again. I am not surprised. I am simply relieved and grateful that after this week---all things and a slice of cheesecake considered---I have not gained.
But let's get back to the love.
My Favorite Mary---who so patiently explains really obvious things like "mic change" to me---tagged me for a cool wikipedia meme.
This hit my "geek me baby one more time" category very happily, a category I worried about recently, since I don't think I've had a good geek-out in a while (or much, which is really out of character).
Here's the meme:
1. Go to Wikipedia and type in your Birthday Month and day only.
2. List 3 Events that occurred that day.
3. List 2 important Birth days.
4. List 1 Death.
5. List a Holiday or Observance. (if any)
6. Tag 5 other bloggers.
Here's my answers:
3 events that occurred on my birthday:
1481 - Francis I of Navarre is proclaimed king. I chose this out of a lengthy list because it's an event and period of time I find fascinating. I've always been a history buff, but I gained an even deeper interest through the fabulous books of Sharon Kay Penman, one of the best writers around and a kind person too. Her books are among my absolute all time favorites.
1883 - American Old West: Self-described "Black Bart the poet" gets away with his last stagecoach robbery, but leaves an incriminating clue that eventually leads to his capture. I chose this because my goodness, what an interesting story! And crime! And evidence! It's like what CSI wishes it was.
1986 - Iran-Contra Affair: The Lebanese magazine Ash-Shiraa reports that the United States has been selling weapons to Iran in secret in order to secure the release of seven American hostages held by pro-Iranian groups in Lebanon. I chose this because it was an event that really shaped my political life, and has haunted our society in many ways since, including through and beyond 1992 - U.S. presidential election: Democratic challenger Bill Clinton defeats incumbent Republican George H.W. Bush and independent candidate Ross Perot. I worked for one of these candidates as a writer, but I won't say which. I will say, though, that not all people are created equally. Some people are Big, really Big in some air-sucking sort of way, so that when you are in their presence, despite any sort of down-to-earth congeniality, you feel more than a little awed. And out of breath.
List 2 important Birthdays:
1895 - Grand Duchess Olga Nikolaevna of Russia (d. 1918). I chose this because the story and all that occurred fascinates me. It's tragic and riveting, not in a rubbernecker way but in a sociological and anthropological with emotions attached way.
1909 - James Reston, American journalist (d. 1995). I chose this because this man is an excellent example of the power words can have, and how sometimes, the pen is mightier than the sword---as imperfect as both might be at times.
I didn't do anything more recent because after about 1952, it's mostly all models, actors, and some singers---most of whom I don't know.
List 1 Death:
What's it mean when I know (and admire) more of the people who died on my birthday than those who were born on it? I'm having trouble choosing one. Matisse? Annie Oakley? Olympe de Gouges? I think I'll go with
361 - Constantius II, Roman Emperor (b. 317). I chose this one because this man---out of his many atrocities and interesting acts---could potentially be held accountable as the largest agent for the onset of the persecution of Jews. His laws disadvantaged Jews in so many ways and arguably were the tinder that lit the fire of the still ongoing persecution and massacres. I find it intriguing that one man's bigotry and agenda that resulted in a couple of laws could be so upheld for so long in a cultural, if not always legal, way. But that's another long, long, blog post some day far, far in the future.
List a Holiday or Observance:
Independence Day in Panama (1903, from Colombia), Dominica (1978, from Britain) and Federated States of Micronesia (1986, from United States). I chose this because I'm not a big fan of empires and colonialism.
Did I tag you for a thinking award? Are you on my blogroll (yes, that list of blogs over there to your right)? Consider yourself wikipedia tagged too!
P.S. Do have a peek over at the Blogroll. I added some people the other day and finally, finally organized it, alphabetically (I hope).
copyright 2007 Julie Pippert