Friday, January 04, 2008

How Santa Let Me Down Big Time (by Patience, age 6) and Honest I Do (by Julie, age mumble mumble)

Subtitle: Ode to Persistence, whom we love mightily and who is fortunate to be so darn cute

Two things multi-sense-ally (call Webster's) sum up the day the girls and I had yesterday.

1. How Santa Let Me Down Big Time by Patience, age 6

Dear Santa,

Last month I wrote a letter to you. I didn't ask for much. Just a kitten, a puppy, and to please, please make my sister calm down.

You did not deliver.

That really, really disappointed me.

I let it go like Mom said to because it's true that you did bring me a Barbie modular flat and Soccer Coach Barbie, which Mom said she'd buy over her dead body. Also you put candy in my stocking, which is big since Mom is mean and never lets us have any.

So against my better judgment of really not being too keen on you, fat jolly stranger, I took Mom's advice and focused on all that I did have instead of what I didn't have.

It was easy to do, at the time.

But you should see what your handiwork (or lack thereof) has wrought.

Santa, you let me down, big time.

Love, Patience, age 6

P.S. Thank you for the Barbie stuff. Mom says you probably never get thank-you notes since most people can't even be troubled to RSVP anymore. So here is a thank you note.

(picture enclosed)

(Patience keeps an almost daily art journal of the day's events. She's recently begun adding words. It's pretty...awesome, actually.)

(Persistence is going through both a growth and developmental spurt, God bless her. Which means the rest of us are too, God bless us.)

2. Honest I Do by Julie (okay actually by Jimmy Reed)

Don't you know that I love you
Honest I do...
I've never placed no one above you,
please tell me you love me....
stop driving me mad
you the sweetest little one that i ever had

I told you I love you
Stop driving me mad
When I woke up this mornin'
I never felt so bad


(many times)

(fade out)


(ignore urge to correct grammar every time line 3 verse 1 comes around)

(add version by The Rolling Stones)


(many times)

(degenerate to Kate Bush's This Woman's Work)

(bless husband for awesome gift buying skillz)

(bless God for whoever invented the iPod)

(thank God for whoever invented Skullcandy ear phones for freakishly small sized ears and exterior noise reduction feature)

Copyright 2007 Julie Pippert
Also blogging at:
Using My Words
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slouching mom said...

thanks for the laughs this morning, j. oh, that patience!

do you KNOW how many songs need correcting/editing? why yes, i think you do.

Suz said...

Very funny letter (and picture). We have one from my husband, written at about the same age, where he requests that Santa send a return receipt as he doubts that Santa even GOT his original Christmas list.

Family Adventure said...

She is too sweet for words. And that picture -- bonus points for details :)


Kathryn said...

Luckily we are at the stage where the boys just ask for trucks. And not even a specific type of truck. Any truck will do.
I think I should have asked Santa to calm my boys down.
I love that pic. I cry when I clean up too. ;)

we_be_toys said...

Great letter to Santa! And the journal? She's a born writer!
I am so proud of you for not correcting the grammar of that song - I know it had to be difficult.
(PS - Was just playing The Sensual World yesterday - Kate is awesome!)

Mary Alice said...

I really like the part about how Mom would buy soccer coach Barbie over her dead body.

SciFi Dad said...

I think you should start an image-blog for Patience's daily recap. I know I'd have it in my RSS reader... that kid is so cute!

Professor J said...

I too have a problem with poor grammar and syntax in songs. And it isn't even necessary most of the time! That's what really bothers me.

liv said...

as the parent of two (cough) spirited children, i have to say that i don't even know what it would be like to have Patience's wish come true. clearly, neither does she. but, i think spirited sisters rock. i bet Persistence is going to keep your family rolling for years.

Sober Briquette said...

So cool. I love to see the kids' artwork. (I love kids, too, even though I've never bothered to put a disclaimer on my blog ;) )

I was thinking that maybe I should make an effort to listen to music in the house (I only listen in the car). You're convincing me.

the dragonfly said...

What a girl, that Patience. Love the picture.

melissa said...

The daily journaling is cool for this age. Does she see you blog?

Soccer coach Barbie? The things I miss out on by having boys...

Jeff said...

Good call... we got our son Skullcandy headphones for Christmas and he absolutely loves them!

flutter said...

Quite the vocabulary ;)

realitytesting said...

I love when they start morphing into emerging writers. It is like watching a flower open...first little letters..and then words...and then they are off and writing. It's the greatest thing.

realitytesting said...

I love when they start morphing into emerging writers. It is like watching a flower open...first little letters..and then words...and then they are off and writing. It's the greatest thing.

NotSoSage said...

Every time I see this kind of art from kids I just. can't. wait. I don't care (hahaha) if it's all polemics about cutting Mama down a size or two. I just want to see her kick it.

Oh...and I have those freakishly small ears, too. I should look up Skullcandy.

Julie Pippert said...

SM, I know exactly how many songs, lines of dialog, signs, and so forth need editing. Sad to say.

I even know when *I* need editing but refuse to fill that role for myself. ;)


Suz that is classic, that letter. Oh fantastic. Return receipt. LOL


Heidi, thanks...she is.


Kathryn, I am often noticeably upset (as in irritated) when naughtiness results in mess...but my chairs! My dining room chairs! My dining room...the one finished grown-up room in my house, my pride. Sigh. Yes, crying.

LOL at me.


We-be-toys, isn't she great (I mean Kate but yeah Patience too).


Mary Alice I am so good at the fake out it's almost scary. ;)


Scifi Dad, that's a good idea, actually.


Prof J, I know (she mourns) I know.


Liv, both my girls will always keep life interesting.


De, LOL disclaimer on your blog. Oh the joy of earplugs. I mean ear phones.


Dragonfly, thanks!


Melissa, yes, she does see me blog. In fact sometimes she helps me. In fact, she might have begun her own chronicles in imitation. A while back I wrote a post about that, actually...for some mom's day contest? It was about how we do our own journaling side by side and how neat it is. She does it spontaneously, now. And it evolved organically...versus being engineered, just FTR.


Jeff, yes, so far I remain extremely happy with them.


Flutter, clearly. ;)


Reality, perfect way of putting it!


Sage, I think the best thing in a parent, seriously, is a little bit of awe and wonder (in a good way) of their kids.

And oh yeah, I can't wait for it for you either. I just *know* it's going to be good.

And even if it's about cutting down a size (and it will be sometimes) you'll get the other, too.

The two drawings not shown (three in this series) say "Mom is nis."

To make me feel better.

You can't beat that.

(Good to see you, babe!)

Karen said...

that was funny - awesome journaling by way and at least you got full credit for cleaning up!

Lawyer Mama said...

Oh, I love that picture journal!

Jenn said...

lol - love the letter and pic :) that's a most serious Dear Santa! and I'm sorry to hear about Barbies winning out over your dead body but, as was suggested to Patience, you may just have to let it go....

and yay iPods!

Mad Hatter said...

Well, they're both artists really. They simply choose different mediums. Burst Bees and upholstery fabric is becoming all the rage in art schools.