Julie Pippert: Using My Words

Guys (men and women) you have to celebrate this holiday. In some way. Any way. Big. Small. A way that will let the person you love know you love him or her. Old or young, it matters. It matters for a lot of reasons. The surface one is that it's because our culture celebrates this holiday and all around each of us is this huge message of SHOW YOUR LOVE. We may say we don't buy into it, or shun "Hallmark" holidays but I am going to call BS on that. Nobody is that cool. Nobody never needs someone to show their love. Nobody ever learns to live perfectly well without love. We all need to feel loved, in some way. And, on special days, like today, we like to see it in some special way. I say this as someone who used to think she was too cool, too strong, too modern to need flowery hearts and fake holiday sentiment. Until I finally admitted I did, said so, and improved my marriage. When we got married, we had an emotional "pre-nup" in which he made me swear to never...

A while back I conceived of this brilliant plot whereby I would conspire to convince SeaWorld that TheMotherhood.com and I could make fantastic co-hosts for an awesome event at their San Antonio location. Friends, I must talk a really great game because I convinced the brilliant (and occasionally omniscient) Kami Huyse and SeaWorld as well as the amazing Cooper and Emily of TheMotherhood.com that this was a very good idea. The next thing any of us knew (ha! as if it was simply movie magic easy LOL!), we were blowing up air mattresses with some of the most fantastic women in Texas to sleep with extremely cute but a little smelly puffins. I've felt at a cross-roads this year, more so lately, which may or may not have anything to do with a recent birthday. I don't mind getting older or even middle-aged, aside from the minor physical inconveniences (great scott, the plucking!) (the sagging elbows!) (the creaky knees!) (enough!) but the big benefit of aging is supposed to be wisd...

So...unless you keep your news reading to high-brow or none at all (and even that's not info-blank safe these days) you probably heard that Max!m released its Unsexiest Woman Alive winner a few months ago and she's Sarah Jessica Parker. (So I'm late to the discussion party. It's still a relevant issue to discuss.) It's deconstruction time. First, let's put this magazine in its place. When I Googled Max!m, this is what I got: Crappy Soft-Porn Lad Mag that, if a man was known to read this frequently and be a big fan and believer of it, should be a real turn-off to everyone carrying double Xs (and by that I mean chromosomes, not porn rating or some other sort of size). Okay okay that's not what Google really said. It really said (and this part is actual for real true): Hot Girls, Sex, Photos, Hot Videos, Sports, Movies and Music, Celebrities Girls, Sex, Sexy, Hotties, Women, Babes, Chicks, Technology, Gear, Video Games, Hotties, Magazine, Maxim Magazine, christ...

Do you ever have one of these days? The other day I woke up full of determination: today I wouldn't feel so tired, be so disorganized, slack off, skip things, and I promised to get things done and be a better mom. I would do the best I could in my life, and in the world beyond my life, too. Today I would be Me and the Person I Ought To Be. The children met me in the hall and I chirped a cheery greeting at them. I was met with a stone face from Patience, and Persistence's usual whining of, "I hun-gee, Mommy, hun-gee, I want bakefest!" I remained cheerful all the way downstairs, to the kitchen, and during breakfast despite Persistence's persistent whining. I kept up the cheerful cadence and rah rah'd the children through their morning routine. But I was flagging. Instead of a real cheer, I was now faking it. Already. As usual I reminded Patience it was PE day and she ought to wear skorts or shorts, something to facilitate athletics. As usual, she came out in a ...