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Interview with two small(ish) girls who will tell you what's what

Patience and Persistence wanted in on this blog thing, so I agreed to let them have an entry. However, faced with two obstacles (blank page and no ability to draw in this window) we compromised on an interview.

Mom: What's your favorite song?

Patience: Blackbird (the Sarah MacLachlan version) and Upside Down from Georgie (Jack Johnson).

Persistence: No! Tissy can't have Georgie! Georgie's MINE!

Mom: It's okay that two people like the same song. I'm glad when someone else likes the same music I do because then we can talk about it. So Pers, what's your favorite song?

Persistence: GEORGIE! (Upside Down by Jack Johnson)

Mom: Any others?

Persistence: WOO HOO SONG! (Big Black Horse and a Cherry Tree by KT Tunstall)

Mom: Tell me about your favorite friend.

Persistence: SABI!

Mom: You've known Sabi your whole life, right?

Persistence: YES! Sabi habing birthday like I hab birthday!

Mom: True! Your birthdays are really close together.

Patience: My friends play jokes.

Mom: Play jokes? Like what?

Patience: I don't know, they just play jokes.

Mom: Okay so is this like the time that boy in your class told you he cut off his finger and the paper clip was holding it on?

Patience: No. Anyway he's a very naughty boy. He never gets trips to the treasure chest. Like I got yesterday.

Mom: You did get a trip, that means 10 greens in a row. And you got a pretty cool surfing penguin.

Patience: Yes! But he doesn't really surf in water, only if I hold him up.

Mom: Well, still neat, right?

Patience: Yes.

Mom: Pers what do you and your friends do at school?

Persistence: Pinch, slap and hit.


Mom: Umm okay, anything else? You do anything else, something fun?

Persistence: Play with ice. DOGGIE! You step on my books!

Mom: What did you do with the ice?

Persistence: Put it in cups. I didn't eat the ice.

Mom: I see. What do you wish you could do that you can't?

Patience: Draw really good pictures, like as good as in a book. I wish I could draw as good as an illustrator and write as good as an author.

Mom (not even wincing over grammar): Is that why you got the "How to draw" book from the library?

Patience: Yeah so I can get better at drawing.

Mom: Did that book help?

Patience: Yeah, but sometimes the rectangles are hard. I can draw a horse now, though, a little bit.

Mom: Pers, and you?

Persistence: I wish I could climb way way up. And fly over my school.

Mom: Would you wave at your friends?

Pers: Yes. I'd fly over Teacher and Sabi.

Mom: How high would you go?

Patience: Would you go into space?

Persistence: Yes! To the moon!

Patience: Would you do it over and over? Would you see a swan?

Pers: I'd see cuckoo ducks.

Much giggling and repeating of "cuckoo ducks."

Patience: What is a cuckoo duck anyway?

Mom: I don't know. Your sister has an intriguing mind.

Patience: Isn't that the truth! Are there princess cuckoo ducks? Is your pig named Coconut?

Pers: YES! Princess cuckoo duck!! NO PIG COCONUT! COCONUT CUCKOO BUTT!

More giggling.


Persistence flips her stuffed toy pig over, lifts its tail and makes a pooting noise. Giggling.

Patience: That's your pig's BUTT!

Mom: Hey let's talk about books or walruses or sealing wax instead, okay.

Patience: SEALING WAX! Is that for BUTTS?


Mom: UGH, anything else besides butts?

Persistence: Jump your pig on mine!

Chaos ensues.

Mom: Okay! Okay! Uncle!

Patience: Name my manatee, Mom.

Mom: How about Melanie the Manatee?

Patience: Okay!

Mom: Any closing remarks?

Patience: I don't have any more. Can we watch Wonder Pets now?

Mom: In a minute. Persistence, anything to say?

Persistence: PIG POOP!

Mom: Yep. Okay. That's deep. Go watch Wonder Pets.

Children exit making pig and pooting noises.

Mom: My little ladies. Cuckoo...cuckoo duck.

Note: Wow, there really is a cuckoo duck! Yeah, not the nicest bird ever.

Copyright 2007 Julie Pippert
Also blogging at:
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slow panic said…
i love it! and i thought only boys loved the butt and poop talking...
Karen Jensen said…
Wow. I'm so glad you interviewed the girls. I like that Persistence likes to play with words.
Bea said…
Loved this. :)
le35 said…
This was hillarious. The "Ugh, anything besides butts" comment reminds me of an xcexperience with my family at the dinner table. We were having a rousing discussion of ghosts and how they haunt everything. My mom go tired of it and said, "Let's change the subject."

My brother exclaimed, "Let's change the subject!"

"Great idea!" From mom with relief.

"His ghost walks the halls of the White House," stated George calmly before the entire family broke out laughing. Mom left the room. I still think it was because she was laughing so hard but didn't want us to see.
le35 said…
I just reread the post, and my brother said, "Let's talk about Abraham Lincoln."

"Good idea."

"His ghost walks the halls of the White House."

Chalk one up for proof reading before hitting the button.
Amie Adams said…
Butts do get a laugh don't they?!
Robert said…
Sounds like you have two cute little ladies there. My two (boy and girl) love to laugh with each other and even hug now and then. Little brother idolizes big sister.
Julie Pippert said…
Jodi, I am torn who talks more crap (butt, poots, poop, noises therein, etc.) boys or girls. I think it's a toss-up in some cases. LOL

Prof J, pretty much all persistence does is play with words. She's like that fortune cookie joke: read it and add "in bed." Except in her case she says what she says and adds in some poop comment.

le35, LOL sympathizing with your mom.

I want everyone to know I *did not react at all* when Patience asked if sealing wax was for butts. OMG the mind boggles at all the things I did not say.
S said…
Pinch, slap and hit.

flutter said…
Kat said…
That was so cute. They are adorable. No butt talk! HA! That sounds familiar. I actually said, "no more poop talk" to my boys today. hehe
One of these days that conversation/interview will be in the format of an IM chat!
Kyla said…
We tried "Potty talk is ONLY for when we are in the restroom." but evidently the loophole in that rule is we are in the restroom at teeth brushing and hand washing and bathing time, too.

Your girls are adorable and hilarious. LOL.
ewe are here said…
My kind of interview... fun and funny!
Melissa said…
When asked by a friend with two older girls and an 8 yr old boy when the potty humor stops, i told her tht it starts at age three, and ends 15 minutes after clinical death.

And my mind is still stuck on sealing wax and afraid....
Should I be frightened if your daughters' minds work a lot like mine? :)

PS: Butts are ALWAYS funny! ALWAYS! AS are poots! (hee-hee)
dharmamama said…
Hey! Be careful, the FCC might fine you $1.43 million, too!

Seth was giggling and giggling when I read him this interview. He said, "I can say butt more than they did!" Of course, he's almost 9 so has quite a head start. Such a lovely child.
SciFi Dad said…
Coconut pig cuckoo butt is 100% pure comedic gold. Don't stifle their obvious genius, Julie.
Anonymous said…
Just doing some blog-hopping and hey, this was so fun to read!! How cute!!
Laura said…
they are too cute! thanks for sharing!
Julie Pippert said…
Queen, you have have to be frightened but I might need to be...since this means Melissa is, as usual, RIGHT!

Sci Fi dad, I do my best not to stifle but WOW the old tolerance tanks the older I get.

Kyla, I find similar things about logical boundaries. I think all kids come equipped with law degrees, for real.

Karen, thanks for dropping by!

Dharma, STG my kids can say butt a lot more too. That's why I cut it off LOL. It's not like it ended there! It moved into the living room where they began commenting on Wonder Pet butts. God help me.

Glad to have provided some laughs.
That's my girl! Feel free to send her over to my blog where the poop flows freely!
You really gave us a sense of each girl's personality. Great post, fun read!!

Lawyer Mama said…
The potty talk has recently become hilarious to Hollis. Sounds like lots more of it to come! (Hey, we were naming a stuffed manatee the other night.)

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